#thisferalheart #poetry #whattheflowersknow
what i want and what i carry
one: what i want
i want to be wanted chosen in every moment not just for who i am but for how i make them feel alive
i want someone to look at me while i am just quietly existing like they are about to eat me
i want my presence to be craved my energy, my laughter, my quirks
i want my face to be touched like it's sacred and someone saying “mine” because they treasure me so much they never want to let go again
i want to feel like i am not asking for anything you didn't want to give anyway
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one point five: [breath catches] the longing, the ache does it make me weak u n g r a t e f u l or is it just my heart being brave being soft enough to hope to want
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two: what i carry
loving someone deeply, truly, no regrets – and still carrying a quiet ache for something they can't quite give you it's such a tender and vulnerable place to be in
when your love is solid and beautiful and true - but there is this one current underneath that's lonely; it's not wrong to feel that way though definitely complicated.
it's not ungrateful or selfish, or betraying them in your heart; it's human. and the desire to be seen, touched, wanted in a way that feels right to you is not a flaw. it is your truth.
being the “more” one - the one who wants more, feels more, aches more - can be so overwhelming; it can make you feel like you have to shrink your desire to keep the peace
but your softness, your kinks, your need to feel wanted and claimed and adored is valid, not extra it's deserving it's you
there's space in a loving relationship to hold that difference to carry it together
but it might mean some really raw and vulnerable conversations it might mean compromise or creative solutions or maybe just being seen in your craving without shame
whichever it will be please know you are allowed to miss what you need even when you love what you have.